UFC on ESPN+ 11: Gustafsson vs. Smith

Duda Santana vs Malecki

santana, dec.

This is a new low for the promotion.Duda fights like she learned combat by defending a taro plantation from raiding monkeys by shouting and throwing green plantains at them, Malecki as though by playing Wii tennis with her kid brother. If you aren't sold yet on the idea that the UFC FW women's division needs to be scrapped, prepare to become a believer, because this fight is going to be a like a stool in the public urinal. These women may in fact be the ****tiest two female fighters I have ever seen. Gold and Silver. And that's saying something, because WMMA in general is awful. This will look like two menopausal half-starved Biafrans fighting over the last MRE in a NATO airdrop. Neither has a future in the UFC, Maybe the goal here is to keep them on the bench as subs for Cyborg if somebody actually good ever pulls out of a future fight. Or maybe they're just here to be fed to cyborg. Or Anderson, to validate her tenure in the UFC. Should either ever fight chris or even Megan here's a preview what those fights would look like:






Evinger vs Lansberg

Evinger, dec.


oh goodee; won't this be a treat. Seriously I have no idea why the matchmakers think anyone wants to see fights like this. I do not believe there is a single human being in existence, nor has there ever been, who is or has ever sat around thinking 'Man, I hope they make Lansberg vs Evinger..that would make my ******* life!'.
At least, like a flu shot or a prostrate exam you know what you're getting and can prepare for it in advance. Firstly,  Evinger: The go-to unkempt beater hag, who is dragged out like the old sweater you mow the lawn in, surly as librarian, smelling of soup and a wet dog, looking like she just woke up from beneath a staircase, to be brickbashed by women the UFC is trying to promote-- which in all fairness is a capacity in which she's ideal in because she is terrible as she is durable. Then you've got Lina lansberg who is also singularly awful and probably only ever gets a phone call because, like evinger, she's as difficult to finish as a poo sandwich.This is a fight that is only happening because ESPN needs warm female FW bodies in the cage, and I, and I suspect nobody else, cares what the outcome is any more they care about 50's vacuum cleaner service logs.

* Edited at 05.20.2019, 3:12 AM ET *

I posted a thread on how to get free chips today....