Preliminary Card | Bantamweight · 135 lbs | MMA
Locks 06.13.2020, 11:00 AM ET
|8-1-0||Pro Record At Fight||6-0-2|
|Last 5 Fights|
|Coconut Creek, Florida||Fighting out of||Toledo, Parana, Brazil|
|23 years, 2 months, 6 days||Age at Fight||24 years, 4 months, 1 day|
|125.9 lbs (57.1 kgs)||Latest Weight||N/A|
|5'6" (168cm)||Height||5'6" (168cm)|
|Akhmat Fight Club Kazakhstan||Gym||Spartacus Academy / Team Bronx Cascavel|
Agapova vs. Gatto Wiki
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Agapova vs. Gatto Fight Predictions
06.01.2020 | 4:01 AM ET
that I have never-ever repeated (as in over and over again in lets say 60 sec) a McGregor quote...period!
But this...haha...this...******** was loud enough and repeated enough times to where I ended up voice activating a ******* iPhone which was at the opposite end of my house. Which was causing Siri to try to look up and figure this **** out for herself at least 8-12 times. This is actually also the first time I might just rather say
"Yeah, this card can go **** itself in the ass with sand lube."
If possible I'd erase it from existence because this seems more like homework (for a class that shouldn't exist which was then translated into some dead African toungue ment for Voodoo chants) than researching fighters.
Which honestly, is a new one for UFC cards in my opinion. So...
This is either going to be the event of the year (maybe even decade), or 2020 was just rolling up its sleeves and we haven't seen ****...yet. Either way I'll make sure im ready....I highly suggest you ****s do the same.
* Edited at 06.01.2020, 4:02 AM ET *
06.01.2020 | 4:48 AM ET
Who the fook is that girl?
And her? And her and her and her.
And this ***** over here...who the fook is she?
Follow the money...more like spend the money then follow the dragon.
Give me your hand I'll show you the way down this road...
Once the **** hits the fan and is now everywhere, its time to move. If my calculations are correct, all 8 menstrual cycles will align the night of the fights.
That + Lean Quarter Moon in the night sky + The blood sacrifice of Tyronious R Woodleonus last weekend + Sacrificial Suicide of Evani Dunhamus + The Rise of TeamRoidTogether (M. Tyson, TRTitor Belfontus, Ra Shaddie Evanitous, and leader only known as Ce-who tho?)
To some this is everyday ****, to people in the know its a giant red flag 🚩. Add this along with the crisis across the planet currently going on...and it can only mean one thing.
Pandemics only happen once every 80 years or so and it happens because things need to happen before a certain "event" can take place.
Step 1) Population cleansing
Step 2) Some guy with white hair will appear and is convinced he the . God of thunder or some ****. Just play along and he will end up . dead/asleep. He is a tweaker and has been awake for 13 years.
Step 3) Mortal Kom-- ****...I mean.
Step 4) FIGHT ISLAND is announced. Dana Khan and Joe Tsung are here to find the strongest warrior on the planet (in their respective weight class). There will be the commercial side of it Shown to the public and for the cost of ¥5°000 shekels on the dark web (or DM me for tickets as low as 80% off retail value) you can watch the real, uncut, no editing and no lovers left living. Fights to the death as 5 of each nations strongest warriors attempt to overcome the others and be the next leader of Fight Island (face of UFC) the winner will take Shang Rogans place as Joe Tsung moves into Dana Khans old position. The 5 faces most likely to represent each Continent are.
1) Europe - Cunnilingor McGregorton - Worthless drunk. Can kill with one strike. Must be perfectly intoxicated and extremely fueled by Puhtootah.
2) USA - Joe "Love da Blow" Jones - Says he's God's very own slave (???)
Has over 1,200 known drug metabolites flowing through his body at any given second. Only been defeated by himself when he wheel kicked his own throat.
3) Canadue - George's "Lay-Pray-Rinse-Jab-Repeat" Street Peeair. Aliens with TRex arms are his top kills. Over 250 confirmed. Guy has PTSD from injection pure FEAR into his jugular before fights. No advantage just pure disadvantage flowing in his veins.
4) Asia - Khabobo Nurmodumagitoffmwa - He jumped rope with Legless Slavs and they're pet Seals at the age of 2. He cut his own umbilical cord with a shank he made in the womb. Heavy favorite to win it all. Only weakness is location recieving.
5) Africa - Frenchetta Mmmgot2. - This beast will lose via sack tap on day one @ 2300+ bet the house.
6) Brazil - Ander's Son's Saliva - Backup warrior and is known to slow time down so much that once he returns to present day, its too late. Everyone's dead. Must stay in the now and later.
Email me at TapmyAss@****hub.com
For odds, live stream link. Unlisted "Fight Island Fight Companion". Fight Island 2nd hand merch. (Taken right off the corpse before Bork Lasar and Danyell CornAir eat the bodys of the losers.) Link to the only site thats taking bets. Fund your account through Bitcoin, USA Dollars/Zanzibar Chimooks. Or sacrificial practice humans (1500 funded for each living donation). Any illegal, uncut drugs. Must be pre-weighed and pre-packaged for Jones to ingest, digest and cry next.
Also for the 2 bonus "Royale-style" fights we have acquired
Chin-2 Jay Leno
1-4-3-1 Jay Z
643-201 Christopher Walken
0-20 Topher Grace
84-0 McCauley Culkin
0-11 Gregory "Tapologys Biological Mother"
pre brain melt Tyson as well.
Joe " Have you tried elk murdered with overdose of dmt and killed while " having out of body experience" Rogan.
Don'forget the live sex show/to the death SHOWCASE BATTLE OF GODS...
Butterbean and Dana White
winner is on next month 'cover of Playboy!
STAY TUNED GUYS MORE TO COME IN TBE FOLLOWING WEEKS AS THE WORLD CRUMBLES.
06.01.2020 | 1:01 PM ET
Sorry. Sorry everyone! Sorry
* Edited at 06.01.2020, 1:06 PM ET *